Planes, trains, subways? Feh.

Auto Gigolo flashes a peace sign and wishes you well on your journey—from the inside of his car.

When public transportation looks like this, I'll pony up.

Our highways are choked,  C02 emissions from automobiles are blackening our skies, highway carnage and damage is a huge ongoing tragedy, and public transportation is encouraged.  Yes.

But I have a little problem with public transportation.

I feel terrible saying this, but—

I don’t want to ride with you.

Any more than I want a roommate, or two, or hundreds.

No offense.  I’m smiling as I write this.  Here’s the truth—

I want to be alone, in my car, with my music, and the companions I choose.  The world is increasingly encroaching—and in this case, “the world” means the hordes on the streets of Manhattan, the island I live on, the upstate malls I go to, the teeming masses at banks, grocery stores, movies, coffee shops, bookstores—and, oh my God, the gym.  People people people in your face face face all the time time time I have to get away away away.

My meditation hut, therefore, has 4 wheels.

I want to pull over if I want to get something to eat, or to go to the bathroom. I want to take a photo of something interesting or amazing. I want to talk to my wife, or put my arm around her and just sit for a few minutes. I want to leave my house when I leave it, not dash, pants half-zipped,  to make that 8:12 train.

I want my guitar in the trunk, my coffee in a holder next to me and my iPod hooked up to my sound system. I want to stop and go shopping for food. At two places if need be.

I don’t want to be on your schedule.

You guys build the car that doesn’t pollute, doesn’t break down and looks halfway decent,  I’ll review it and maybe even buy it. I’ll even sit in traffic, gladly.  Want to cut in? Be my guest.  I’m not in that big a hurry.  I can use the break from the phone, the computer, the total immersion in this totally artificial world. I’m in a pod/cocoon while I drive and no matter what happens—heat, rain, snow, traffic—I’m the brain and the car’s my body, and together we regard the world.

If a nut with a bomb wants to take out a bunch of people, he’s not going to target my individual transportation device, either. He’s going to get on a subway or train.

When I want to interact with folks, I’ll do it on the street, at the office, at family gatherings—or in bed.

-Josh Max, Auto Gigolo